Immediate Steps to Break Free
Just want to know how to finally stop people-pleasing? Feeling trapped in the cycle? It’s time to regain control and rediscover your authentic self. Here are five things you can do right now to start your journey towards putting yourself first:
- Reflect on Your Triggers: Take a moment to think about situations or people that tend to trigger your people-pleasing tendencies. Awareness is the first step toward change. Is anything standing out to you?
- Practice Saying “No”: Start small by declining a request or invitation that you would normally say yes to. Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your own needs.
- Set Boundaries: Identify areas where you need to establish boundaries. This could involve communicating your limits to others and ensuring they’re respected.
- Connect with Your Feelings: Throughout the day, check in with yourself and acknowledge how you’re feeling. This practice can help you become more attuned to your own needs. You can even do this when waiting for the kettle to boil, sitting in traffic or walking the dog.
- Engage in Self-Care: Dedicate time to activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Taking care of yourself reinforces the idea that your happiness matters.
Breaking Free from People-Pleasing
It’s easy to fall into the habit of people-pleasing. Society often encourages us to be accommodating and kind, but sometimes this desire to please can become overwhelming, leading to feelings of being stuck and disconnected from our own desires. Counselling offers a safe space to explore these feelings and patterns, enabling you to untangle the web of people-pleasing and rediscover your own needs and wants.
Fed up with finding yourself agreeing to things you wish you hadn’t? Maybe you feel like you’re walking on eggshells with certain family members. Or dreading your boss asking you to stay late because you end up saying yes when actually, you need to leave? It’s time to stop people-pleasing.
The Power of a Person-Centred Approach to Stop People-Pleasing
At the heart of effective counselling lies the person-centred approach. This approach recognizes that you are the expert of your own life and experiences. It’s not about the counsellor telling you what to do or how to feel. We won’t actually tell you how to stop people-pleasing. Instead, it’s about facilitating a journey of self-discovery, growth, and empowerment. In the context of people-pleasing, this means working at your own pace to understand the underlying triggers, fears, and insecurities that keep you trapped in this cycle. You decide for yourself how you will change and what you will or won’t do.
Working in this way with my clients enables them to decide what is right for them, and I have been told they felt stuck living to try and keep others happy, whether that is parents, family members, an old teacher, friends or romantic partners. One of the loveliest things about developing a working relationship within a person-centred approach is that you can feel what a safe, open relationship feels like, where you are heard and respected. This is also a safe space for you to test out voicing your needs, and speaking up for yourself – and come away feeling stronger in your day-to-day life.
If you feel similar, you can find ways to be able to take action on what truly feels right for you. Counselling can help you feel supported along the way.
People-Pleasing Prevents Authentic Happiness
True happiness comes when we embrace our authentic selves. Through counselling, you can learn to set healthy boundaries, communicate your needs, and make choices that align with your values. The process may be challenging, but the rewards are immense – a newfound sense of freedom, self-acceptance, and the ability to build deeper and more meaningful relationships.
Overall, the rewards of self-discovery and self-acceptance through counselling are immense. While the journey may be challenging at times, the benefits are well worth the effort. So take the first step towards breaking the cycle, to stop people-pleasing and enjoying your life again.
When people-pleasing is causing you to not be your real self, it can instigate a sense of loneliness. When people know the real, authentic you – you’re more able to build a stronger connection with them.
Imagine letting the little dance in the kitchen out, the song you like to sing in the shower or whilst driving without fear of what they will think! You can let out your frustrations without worrying about being judged for being ‘too angry’.
When you stop holding back for fear of upsetting others, you are being more authentic, and living in a way that is honest. It can be scary, but with practice and support, you can start living unapologetically.
Take the First Step Today
If you’re ready to stop people-pleasing and embark on a journey towards authentic happiness, consider reaching out for counselling. Whether you’re located in Southend-On-Sea, Essex, or prefer online sessions, professional help is just a click away. I am dedicated to guiding you through your unique journey, empowering you to take charge of your life and find joy in being your true self.
Start Your Journey To Stop People-Pleasing Now
Don’t wait any longer to reclaim your happiness and break the cycle. Contact me today to start counselling – either online or in person in Southend-On-Sea, Essex. Your authentic self is waiting to emerge, and I’m here to support you every step of the way. Take the leap towards a more fulfilling and liberated life. Your journey to authentic happiness begins now.